oook.. so I haven't written in this thing in forever. How is everyone doing?

soo today I had a decent day.. I got a suprise visit from Maddie and Stephanie. That was great & made me happy.. I went to the mall. I shopped around and found some cute things for the concert.. well I am really tired right now.. So I will update sometime later on.. love yall.

<33

AHHHH....

MY FRIENDS ARE FREAKEN AMAZING...

<33

ahhhhh....

I love being a SENI0R.

enough said for now... ohh & one more thing Wilson County Fair tomorrow.. & im soo going.. who else is planning to go? let me know somehow!

<3

well hello everyone.... I haven't updated this thing because i've been in KY. I got back 2 days ago. and Im already missing it up there.I did a lot of things there. Like going to the movies, hanging with the family, and doing a LOT of shopping . Well I have been doing a lot of thinking the past few weeks. And I realized that I matured a lot of the summer. It seems like whatever I cared about before doesn't tie me down like it used to. Which is soo great because now I have time to please myself and not having to worry about the un-important people. I've moved on for real this time. and it feels great. It's my senior year and im going to live it up like each day is my last. But yeah.. school is less than 4 days away. Im excited and nervous at the same time. My mom told me that she is getting me a limo for graduation. So im being driven down to Belmont for graduation and after graduation we are driving around town in it. ahhh im soo excited. and it's going to be even better because my 2 best friends Izzy and Jasmine are going to be in it with me.  Well enough for now. Im getting my hair colored today & highlighted monday.soo excited...

-x0x0

 -A Sad State of Mind-

My emotions the past few days have been driving me crazy. It's like I don't know what to do anymore. I don't know what to do to make me happy. and people don't help me feel better either. I am asking myself "what's wrong with me". Well I went to the doctor the other day and it turned out that I have migrains, acid reflux, and possibly depression.. I mean gosssh. can it get any freaken worse?! The doctor wants me to talk to a psycholgist. I don't know if I should because people that went to them before said it was stupid and not worth going to. and to make matters worse. my dad and a few other of my family members think that im just making it up and just laughing in my face and making me feel like absolute shit. Which brings me to the conclusion that I may not have anyone to turn to anymore. Everyone else I would turn to before are too much involved with theirself and others. I mean... I've also felt like I've been being used by this one person. They don't talk to me or hang out with me unless I talk to them first.. The only time this person wants to see me is if they want something from me or if I made them something. If you are reading this, and think this is about you.. most likely...it is.Anyways.. I just hate feeling like that and being used like that. It makes me feel even more down and makes me feel more worthless..and to tell the truth, as much as I want to let them go. I can't because I once thought of them as one of the greatest friends in the world & I put my trust in them and confided in them.. and this is what I get in return. I guess I am just stupid. I mean to think of them as one of my *true* friends in the first place.. My really good friend told me to find new ones to confide in.. but honestly it's not that easy. Others that know me personally know I hate letting things go and moving on.. ohh well.. I will just have to push myself to and hopefully have my old/true friends come back and help me move on.. anyways.. tomorrow im heaving to KY for god knows how long. I am happy. I get to finally see my mom and my sister. and above all get to just escape from TN and like kinda start over.. soo if you want to talk to me or care enough about me, you will call me while im there. soo goodbye & talk to you guys later.

p.s. if you read each and every word of this.. I really admire you. <3